Session 165: Double Jenny Across the Sky

[icastsword]

Griffin is concentrating on Expeditious Retreat. Nellie is concentrating on Sissyphus.

ROUND 4

Jericho assesses the foliage. He’s going to try a thing to improve our lives. He would like to cast Dispel Magic on the Wall of Thorns. Wall of Thorns is a 6th level spell, so the DC to dispel it is 16. He rolls a 21. The wall of thorns falls apart, crumbling into nothing.

Jericho plays a sick riff on Antonio the violin mimic, and the wall is gone.

He gives Bardic Inspiration to Griffin. He moves closer to the action so he can maybe do some shit in a few turns.

Spore Servant shambles.

Since the Wall of Thorns has been dispelled, Jenny measures some distances. Crimeny is hidden and invisible. Griffin is close enough, but she’s got something better for Jericho. :(

Jericho has to roll a Con save, but with Disadvantage. He rolls a 12. That does not save. Uh oh. He takes 16 Radiant damage as a silvery circle of moonlight appears above him. Is it specifically moonlight? It’s the Moonbeam spell!

Now Jericho rolls Wisdom to keep himself in check. He rolls a 15. Jericho doesn’t do a full transformation, he’s just starting to go Cronenbird again. This is going to mess up his Dex Saves (disadvantage), give him disadvantage on Charisma, but he will now have advantage on Strength Saves. Int and Wis are okay. Nellie and Serra have an aside. They roll Arcana. Nellie rolls 16 Arcana and 14 Nature. Serra rolls 19 Nature and 17 Arcana. Getting rid of Moonbeam will halt any further transformation, but Jericho will not just immediately revert back. It’ll probably take a minute or two.

Jenny shambles back a bit. Her work here is done.

Shane can see Jericho from where he’s at, way back at the entrance to the grove. Shane is weighing the pros and cons. Do we let him goose out and kill better, or do we turn him back into a man?

Shane has 2 spell slots, so he’s not going to help. He’s going to do something else. He thinks the Fap Zone is no longer serving its purpose, it’s in his way, so he lets it go.

Shane scrumbles 30 feet forward to take cover behind a big arc of thorns. Even with the fap zone gone he can’t see any enemies. Wait, he can see Jenny and one of the spore servants. But they’re out of range of Eldritch Blast! He needs to cast a spell that shoots further and gooder. Actually, he’s going to use his action to dash and get closer to the action. He scrumbles closer to a tree to use as cover.

It’s Serra’s turn to cast Dispel Magic. She shuts off Jenny’s Moonbeam. Jericho feels the change reversing. She moves to the edge of the difficult terrain.

Jennifer Greenteeth’s turn. She points an arrow at Griffin. Ant thinks. Griffin has to roll a Dex Save. He rolls a 16. He saves and takes half damage - 14 Slashing halved from 28. A wall of thorns erupts in his path as he rushes towards Jenny Greenteeth. Aww, man. :(

As her bonus action, Griffin has to roll ANOTHER Dex Save and he fails with a 12. Jenny Greenteeth casts Grasping Vine. Since he failed the Dex save, he gets yanked towards the vine, which yanks him right into the wall of thorns. He has to roll ANOTHER dex save andfails with a 6, taking 29 additional slashing damage as he is yanked into the wall of thorns.

Crimeny dashes forward with their bonus action and movement. They roll Nature. How do thorns feel about hot sauce? 16 Nature. Is Crimeny going to make a fucking stir fry? The thorns themselves are indifferent to hot sauce, but coating the thorns in hot sauce is going to be a problem for any fleshy people going through them. They roll a 24 medicine. It’d basically be like salting an open wound.

Crimeny takes out an arrow and applies the hot sauce to it. It’s Infernal hot sauce, too.

Nellie continues to move action-wards. There are yet MORE thorns in the way now. She steps out of the difficult terrain, to stand right near Jericho. This is Fine. She asks how he’s doing. He says better - he feels less itchy. He’s allergic to moonlight.

There’s not a lot Nellie can do, because now her line of sight is blocked by thorns. She hits Jericho with a 2nd level healing taser. He recovers 13 health. Jericho asks Nellie if she wants a ride, because he can go straight fucking up. Hop into his arms, Nellie! He’ll be her helicopter. Together, they will rain death from above.

Distant Corpseflower shambles and poops

Near Corpseflower shambles and poops. There are so many new shambling corpses on the field.

Griffin scrumbles through the wall of thorns to the other side, and casts a 2nd level Magic Missile at Jenny. He does 20 damage. Now Jenny has to roll 4 concentration saves. She saves all four times. Griffin also has to roll some belated Con saves for his Expeditious Retreat, and saves on both. He is still concentrating.

Sisyphus dashes his 60 feet underground, and is now underneath the action. He will lurk there until next round.

ROUND 5

Jericho has a Nellie in his arms. He flies 30 feet straight up, and now Nellie feels SO tall. He only needs verbal components to cast Raulothim’s Psychic Lance on Jennifer, who has to make an INT save. She saves with an 18. She takes half damage and is not incapacitated. She takes 16 halved from 32, and needs to make another Concentration save. She beefs it with a 6. The Wall of Thorns disappears.

Spore Servant shambles. It dashes.

Distant Jenny draws an arrow at Griffin. A 20 foot radius circle grows around him. No, she puts it south of him, putting him at the edge of the circle. Griffin rolls a 23 Con save and takes half damage. He takes 11 Piercing damage and is in a swarm of locusts. The zombie fails its save and dies with 22 damage.

Jenny retreats 30 feet.

Shane moves 30 feet, hugging the tree line. He rolls Nature with Advantage on Jenny because she’s his dad’s pet project. He rolls a dirty 20 Nature. She can walk through trees, but she is affected by difficult terrain. He casts Plant Growth. All the plants in a 100ft radius become wild and overgrown and difficult terrain.

Spore Servant is in Shane’s shitty plant zone and moves 10 feet with its dash.

Serra uses her action to dash 60 feet closer to the action, and casts Healing Word on herself for 7HP.

Jennifer is cornered a bit. She can’t move, but she can cast spells. Griffin and Serra are both in range. She makes Serra roll a dex save: 16. She saves! She takes 7 lighting damage halved from 14 as a lightning bolt lances down from the ceiling. She saves on Concentration and the Spirit Guardians remain. Jennifer doesn’t realize Sissyphus is right underneath her, so she moves into the vines a bit, hoping they’ll provide cover.

Crimeny is in turbo difficult terrain. If they bonus action dash, they can go 15 feet. In Shane’s defense, Crimeny is invisible and he didn’t know they were in there. They move 7.5 feet more with their action.

Spore Servant dashes.

Spore Servant dashes and gets tangled in Serra’s Spirit Guardians. It rolls a Wisdom Save. It beefs it with an 11, but only takes 9 damage. It’s not dead!

Nellie assumes Jericho isn’t the type to fireball himself. That’s the other campaign. She casts Ice Storm at the 6th level on Jenny, the Corpseflower, and two spore servants. Corpseflower fails, Spore Servant fails with a 15, other Spore Servant fails with a 15, Jennifer saves with a 22. Full damage is 34, half is 17. Jenny fails on her Concentration Save, and her biting swarm of locusts disappears.

Corpse Flower stays where it is and jiggles.

Other Corpse Flower is partially in the ice storm difficult terrain. It moves out and away.

Griffin has a clear shot to Jenny. He’s got Expeditious Retreat. There are a few little vines in his way, and he rolls 24 Athletics to leap right over it. He doesn’t even have to cast the Jump spell. He can finally roll to attack.

His first hit is a 28 and his second is a 23.

Hit 1 = 9 Slashing & 6 Cold = 15
Hit 2 = 13 Slashing & 1 Cold = 14

29 total damage total. Jennifer screeches in pain.

He Action Surges for two more hits, buit misses with a 16. But wait, he has Bardic! He rolls a 7 on the d8 to bring his total to 23. That hits! His second attack is a 24.

Hit 3 = 10 Slashing, 2 cold = 12
Hit 4 = 16 Slashing, 2 cold = 18

He does an additional 30 damage. Ant makes a noise. Jennifer staggers. And falls.

Crimeny, Serra, and Griffin roll Perception and Nature. Griffin rolls a 4 Perception and a 5 Nature. He turns around immediately to deal with the Spore Servant that’s right next to him.

Crimeny and Serra both look at the other Jenny Greenteeth. She is screaming, apparently in pain. Cracks of light start to appear throughout her body. She erupts into light and explodes. Crimeny assumes Griffin found the younger Jenny, killed her, and therefore created a time paradox.

Sissyphus pokes his head out of the ground and sees the Jenny is gone. It looks to Pip for instructions. She tells him to get the flower! He continues to burrow until he gets to the corpse flower, and he punches it. He hits with a 14 and a dirty 20. He does 31 damage with his two slams.

Nellie rolls Nature: 29. It’s like he’s punching a bean bag chair. There are crunches, she can’t tell if they’re dead bodies or people bodies. Jericho says we’re fine!! We’ve got diamonds, we’ve got Revivify, we’ve got a minute!!! It’s fine!!!

Nellie tells Sissyphus to go after the zombies next turn. :’D

ROUND 6

Jericho moves up 30 feet, bringing Nellie with him. What spells does he have that don’t have somatic components? Well, he’s got Vicious Mockery. He makes fun of the Spore Servant in Serra’s Zone. It fails with a 14. It takes 10 damage. When he says "You’re an ugly sonnovabitch," it looks up at Jericho, and dies.

Shane Bishop is up. He’s on his way! He’s trying so hard! He sees a Spore Servant and shoots it with Eldritch Blast. Two of his three blasts hit. The third one goes wide because he’s so winded he can’t hold up his hand anymore. He does 26 damage. Nugget popped.

Spore Servant flails at Griffin but misses with a 13. That’s its turn.

Serra moves 30 feet. How’s that Corpseflower looking? Mashed. She moves another 30 feet and ends her turn.

Crimeny has a hot sauce arrow. They move out of the shrubbery. They bonus action to dash. The hot sauce is going to go to the plant. We’re gonna make stir fry. Crimeny aims towards the base of the corpse flower to hopefully avoid hitting any bodies or people. They hit with an unnatural 20. Sissyphus is right there so they get Sneak Attack. They do 37 damage.

Wait, how much damage does spicy do? 1d8. That brings the total up to 38. This plant doesn’t like Infernal hotsauce. The flower sags, its petals falling open and dumping bodies out onto the ground. Some of them are already spore servants, but some of them are quote-unquote "healthy".

Nellie can see the distant kumbaya of six spore servants. Her Ice Storm can catch all of them. All six fail on dex and they each take 22 damage. They are all pummeled to shit.

Corpseflower has run out of corpses. It retreats. It shuffles into the grove behind it.

Griffin rolls a 21 to hit the spore servant right next to him.

13 Slashing + 2 Cold = 15

It dies.

Jericho directs Serra to the unconscious people. Nellie directs Sissyphus to go pick the other corpse flower. Carefully. Let’s do some gardening.

Serra rolls Medicine on the people - 31. She also rolls Nature - 21. A number of these corpses are essentially pod people, but there are a number who are still alive. They absolutely need medical attention, especially the ones that got smashed by Sissyphus. She realizes the people were being used as feed for the corpse flower while it was pumping duplicates out of the pods. With the corpse flowers dead, the pods will die on their own.

Meanwhile Griffin will go peel the other corpse flower like a banana to extract any survivors.

We recover 10 people. Eight of them are survivable. One of those eight is in critical condition.

Now Serra and Nellie roll History. Nellie rolls a 15, Serra rolls a 23. Based on some of their belongings, some of these people were yanked here from the past.

Meanwhile, Griffin and Jericho roll Athletics to peel the corpse flower like a banana. Crimeny gets out their herbicide. Sissyphus can burrow freely and distribute that directly to the roots. Shane has to explain what to do to Sissyphus. They have a very silly conversation.

Griffin ignores this and rolls a 17 Athletics to peel the petals down. Jericho rolls a 22 Athletics. It is fighting, thwacking with its vines. It slaps him across the face. He is outraged.

Meanwhile Sissyphus finally takes the herbicide

There is the sound of rumbling, and the sound of a canister being crushed, and the corpseflower starts going bananas. Jericho and Griffin roll Dex Saves. Griffin beefs it with a 10. Jericho rolls good.

Jericho sees what’s coming a mile away and he leaps back. Griffin is too in the zone - he’s got to get this thing open. He is hit full force with the goop. He is covered head to toe in corpseflower stink. Ten bodies fall out, hitting the floor.

Griffin is just stink. Jericho rolls a good medicine. These people are all still alive, and he does see Oscar’s mom. She is unconscious and in desperate need of medical attention.

Time for history. Jericho rolls a 22. Griffin rolls a 6. It also looks like Oscar’s mom is dressed from many years ago. She’s rocking that 90’s fashion.

Well this is a conundrum.

Serra’s got an in with Ambrosia. Can she contact him?

Okay, Serra is going to take 10 minutes to prepare Sending and attempt to contact Shane 64 so he can call Interplay and tell them there are a bunch of injured mundies down here, and some of them are time travelers.

Serra casts Sending. Ant rolls a dice to see if Shane 64 wakes up. He does, but barely. She has a very frustrating conversation with him, but manages to convey to him that he needs to call the authorities to help these 18 injured people and Interplay to let them know we’ve got some time travelers down here.